Challenging times

My son has a cough and has been off school for three days. He is in his final year and is behind with some of his subjects, (as was amply conveyed to us at a parents evening tonight!).

My eldest son wants to study Optometry, and because of the lack of universities teaching this, the entry standard is higher even than that required to study medicine. Therefore he needs two grade A's and a B in science A levels to get in. He is strugging with one of the subjects and his stress levels are creating a tense atmosphere. With two adolescent sons in the house there is a tsunami of testosterone smiting everything in its path.

Today, the Head of the school where my wife works announced that their jobs are in jeopardy due to a budget shortfall. So as she is the main income earner of the house, this could be a serious problem, especially as my work has dried up.

It's at times like these you really appreciate having a friend nearby whose shoulder you can cry on and unburden your problems on - Oh silly me! there is no such person. I am totally and utterly, now what's the word? I looked it up on a thesaurus and these were the suggestions:

abandoned, batching it, by itself/oneself, companionless, deserted, desolate, detached, forlorn, forsaken, friendless, hermit, individual, in solitary, isolated, lone, lonely, lonesome, me and my shadow, me myself and I, onliest, only, on one’s own, shag, single, sole, solitary, solo, stag, traveling light, unaccompanied, unaided, unassisted, unattached, unattended, unescorted, unmarried, widowed

I don't think 'shag' is relevant, although it would take my mind off things:¬)

No, I think I like the term 'travelling light.' That insinuates that I arrived in this situation by choice. You would have thought that someone who was jobless, friendless, pennyless, (I nearly typed penisless then, which would be even more regretable), would be depressed, but actually I'm not. I think years of self-reliance have finally taught me to take these things less seriously. That's not to say that a good friend wouldn't be appreciated. Given the chance I would be the most giving, loyal, supportive and loving friend. It does feel like this energy is wasted some times as there is no one to lavish it on. But I have began to accept, that how ever my circumstances have turned out, it is the way things are meant to be. I have let plenty of friends go in the past, so maybe this is karma in action.

The employment/financial situation does complicate things a bit though. It might make me look for viability instead of allowing creativity to be the main driving force. Is this another one of those bleeding crossroads in life again? God help me choose the correct turning this time!

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